Even though its over, i still feel crappy

So finally, the big ass project I've been handling is finally over.

Of course, the boss will eventually take all the credit...

What i find becomes what she found...
What I did will be come what she did...
BUT! what mistake happens, or what other don't like... becomes... what I did...

But i reached a point where i just shut it out... Now is just to sit and wait... till December... Steph... hang in there with me...=) We'll make it...

So yesterday, after every guest had their fun, and my feet was sore, pain and full of numbness from running up 3 floors, and down 2 floors to go back to the 2nd floor and then to the atrium and then back in again... and most of the time, at the bossiness of "the second wanna fucking be boss".

"You should go stand by boss in the store, see if she needs help"

So I go, i ask if she's enjoying herself, she snubs me off and says "yeah, yeah, yeah", gives me the hand flick and turns away... I ask if she needs anything, she ignores me... So I stand by her, ignored, and not introduced to the people she's P, fucking R-ing with despite my obvious presence beside her for a good 5 mins... i walk off... finally...

Only to walk out, and then get bossed at AGAIN... and so the list of bossiness continues...

Few minutes later, she sees me and scolds me for not having me and my other colleagues to stand by her to handle the media cause there are too many for her to handle... great... ignore me for being by you... HAhaha... crazy nut!

we HAD to go for "celebratory" drinks... To be honest, my thoughts of "celebratory" was not to have to spend it with them... if it was just with Steph and Lincoln, THEN would it be celebratory!

I thought that it being all over, would make me feel happy again... but even now, as I watch what time i have left of Saturday tick its way by... I still have the same feeling of "i don't wanna go back to work on Monday" feeling. It's strange though. But as the event slowly came to a close, and i stood at the registration table, watching our guests slowly get lesser and lesser I did tell myself..."good job val... you managed to pull this off..." but at the same time, i just wanted to squat down behind the table and sob a little...

I can't explain the feeling, but I guess i was kinda sad that i did not really seem to feel THAT proud of myself for what I had done... This project drained so much of life out of me... I just would have rather turned back time, have my life from May - October back, than to stand there and force myself to feel like i achieved something. strange huh???

The 1 thing I enjoyed though...was having people come up to me and telling me I did a good job rather than going to *ahem* "her" to say those words. Its good to see that others probably recognized that I was the 1 who did this... I hope......

BTW...i Love this video... =) hahaha! anyways, side note... the beginning of the video, how the guy feels... is how i feel every morning to work... LOL! I know i'm not alone on this!